Now that I’m pregnant again, I’ve been reflecting on my previous experience with giving birth with mixed emotions. I ended up with a C-section the first go around. It was definitely not what I had hoped for, but it ended up being the only real choice.
This time around, I’ve requested a C-section. Not because I want one but because it seems like the best option available to me. The circumstances that lead to my first C-section are likely to recur and if you are going to have a C-section anyway, it’s much nicer to have a planned one than an emergency C-section after a long time of trying for a vaginal birth and not getting anywhere.
But I can’t say I feel 100% comfortable with the decision. I don’t feel that anyone pressured me into having a C-section – there really was no other option, but I do feel like my body failed me. I feel a little betrayed that it wouldn’t do so many of the things required to birth a baby. Perhaps part of the reason I don’t want to try again is because I don’t trust my body anymore? I don’t know. Regardless, this is not a decision I have made lightly and I do not suspect I’ll be changing my mind.
While I’m thinking about it, I thought I’d share a bit my first experience having a C-section. A few things that surprised me and a few benefits to having a C-section.
But first, a PSA:
Denying the possibility that you could end up having a C-section, will not ensure that you will not have one, but will ensure that you are not as prepared as you could be.
Trust me – if denial worked, I would not be writing this article. By all means think positively, but at the same time, don’t skip that section in your book or however you are preparing yourself and make sure you have a plan in place for if you need to be in the hospital for 3 days (or more).
Things that Surprised Me:
Even though you can’t feel any pain you can still feel everything. I did not see this coming. It is kind of creepy and this makes many people nauseous.
You will still bleed. Have pads in your bag. Big ones. These will also come in handy if your water breaks before you get to the hospital.
Some Benefits
Medical professionals stop being so interested in your lower lady parts.
There is no way you’re going to get an episiotomy and the ‘trauma’ to that general area is low.
You don’t have to wait any longer to have sex after having your baby or to have your next one than women who have vaginal births but you may be more likely to listen to the recommendations.
In Calgary you get priority for a private room. This can quickly turn into a negative as if there is not one available when you are getting your room they will not move you to a private room and you will be sharing for the whole 3 days.
Your husband or support person will probably change all the diapers in the first couple days.
So did you have a C-section? How did you feel about it? How did you decide whether to try for a vaginal birth or not afterwards? Did you feel as ambivalent about the decision as I do? Any other benefits I missed?
With Finley I was induced at 37 weeks and was in intense labour for 26 hours and nothing happened. I had an emergency csection and a terrible ordeal that landed me in the icu for 10 days. at first i was disappointed that i wasn’t able to fulfil my goal of a natural childbirth and was actually quite bitter when i heard others were able to. Eventually i got over it and i had to do what was right at the time. when i got pregnant with penelope, the first decision I made was to have a planned csection. Actually it was made before i even got pregnant and i don’t regret it a bit. i knew that after what happened with Finley that going into labor naturally the 2nd time round just wasn’t option. psychologically i knew i wouldn’t be able to do it. i was just too terrified. having a planned csection was a breeze compared to the first time and you will feel that too. everything just seemed easier. and i still kept my csection date a secret so that everybody was surprised with exception of greg’s brother who watched Finley. I have no regrets at all. At the end of the day, you have to do what’s best for you and your baby. Good luck!
@Becky Thanks for your comments Becky. I know it will be better planned, and that’s part of why I want to do it. I think I’ll end up there anyway, and it would be so much easier if I was prepared, not exhausted from the attempting a vaginal birth and having had 2 miserable sleeps, and my arms were shaking so hard from being on the epidural for so long.
I just wish I could know it was the right decision, but like so much in life, that’s just not possible.
With M I had a planned c-section (well, planned at the last minute) because she was breech and nothing I did could get her to move (in fact, I think she was stuck in place). But up until the point where they told me she was breech and I would need to have a c-section I was skipping all the parts about having a c-section so I laughed at your PSA. With F I got the go-ahead to have a vaginal birth since there was nothing wrong with M or my pregnancy the first time – she was just stuck head up (it was creepy in fact because you could see her headbutting me from the inside). F was head down at 38 weeks when my water broke and then… nothing. 25+ hours of labour-inducing drugs and… nothing. So I had another c-section and it was still a much easier recovery than the first. As much as I was against having c-section #2 what I really wanted – and got – was another healthy baby. So many women have asked me if I was disappointed but why worry about what is done? My girls are healthy and beautiful and I healed and life goes on. 🙂
You’ll do great.