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8 Things I Love About Cooler Weather

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I can be a bit of a weather whiner – I don’t like it too hot, or too cold, or too windy. Luckily Calgary weather provides a lot of opportunities for people who like to complain about the weather. If you’re not unhappy with the weather right now, just wait, it’ll change soon enough. To shake things up a bit, instead of complaining I thought I’d write a list of things I look forward to with the cooling temperatures.

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1. My Winter Duvet – there is nothing better than snuggling into a big fluffy duvet.

2. My Oven – Most of my favorite recipes involve my oven. Cooking is so much more fun when you don’t melt while you do it.

3. No Bugs! – The best thing about freezing cold weather – it kills off all the bugs.

4. Hot Drinks – I love warming my hands on a hot mug of tea.

5. Jackets – my seatbelt always sits better when I’m wearing a jacket, I hate it rubbing against my skin.

6. No sunscreen – I don’t have to worry about Gordie getting a sunburn while we are playing outside.

7. You can always put on more clothes but there is a limit to how much you can take off.

8. Fall TV – What can I say? I love my TV shows.

I was going for 10 things but I still really miss summer. Maybe I’ll have to read my list again.

I’m Finding Myself Unable to Resist a Good Challenge–Outdoor Play Challenge

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My friend Misty wrote a post called “Life Outside – Making Myself Responsible” where she challenges herself to take her son outside everyday.

I’ve decided to take up the challenge with her. During the summer, this was not something I had much trouble with, but this month, I’ve been kind of bad. Even though the weather has often been lovely, I haven’t felt like going anywhere. We’re expecting another baby in March and pregnancy makes me feel soooo tired.

Although I’m starting to feel a bit more energetic now that I’m in my 2nd trimester, the weather is not going to be making it more attractive for me to go outside as it gets colder.

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I think outdoor play is so important for kids. I also think it makes it easier to care for them too. Way less mess to clean up, less to get into and they love it so much!

Today was the first day of our challenge and happily it was successful. We went for a walk to the grocery store (at which I was an impulsive sucker, buying a halloween cup, mini pumpkin, decorative corn and monkey stickers) and collected leaves and pinecones along the way.

Although the walk isn’t far, our neighborhood is VERY hilly. Getting to the store isn’t bad, but getting back is basically uphill the whole way. I had to take a lot of breaks. I have a feeling that perhaps there is some middle ground between doing nothing and trying to kill myself. Is it just me that has this problem?

We stopped off at a playground on the way home (Mama needed a break) and saw a woodpecker a couple blocks from home.

I’m sure most of our outdoor play won’t take all morning, especially when it gets cold, but I’m excited to try to keep it up and make it fun.

Anyone interested in taking the challenge too?

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Just Call Me Mother of the Year

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This is why I think I should be awarded the title of Mother of the Year.

Reason #1 – Gordie didn’t do any kind of art all summer including coloring. My Calgary Playground Review blog showed all the outdoor activity we did, but what it didn’t show was that was ALL we did. We went out in the morning to a playground and the most impressive thing we did after that was having a nap.

Reason #2 – This month Gordie and I have hardly left the house. Although I finally did get some art supplies, we’ve hardly gone anywhere. I don’t think we’ve gone to a single playground, and even on the really nice days we often just stay home. Kids don’t need sunlight and fresh air do they?

Reason #3 – Gordie often wears pajamas from nap time until bed time. Gordie often asks to wear pajamas for nap – and anything that is going to make him sleep better I’m all for. But seriously, how often am I supposed to change his clothes? If we’re not going anywhere, he is likely to wear them until he goes to bed.

Reason #4 – I think I spend more time looking for fun things to do with Gordie than actually doing them. But I have an awesome board on pinterest filled with ideas – it’s almost as good right?

Reason #5 – I hate singing Gordie his bedtime song. I know some lullabies that I really love, Douglas Mountain, Morningtime Ride, Baby’s Boat. But I end up singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, every single night and for every nap. Really, the song is just not that great.

Reason #6 – I’m finding it really difficult to get my energy together to make good food. One time Gordie ate Kraft Dinner for lunch, dinner and lunch again the next day.

Those are just a few of the reasons why I think I deserve the title of Mother of the Year. How about you? Any confessions to make?

Juggling Being a Crier and a Mommy

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I am a crier. Being in control of my tear ducts is not one of my imagestrengths. Although this was not helped by pregnancy hormones, I was a crier long before I was pregnant and I still am.
I don’t just cry when I am sad. I’ve also been known to cry when I’m angry. This was confusing for my friends as a child. I nearly backhanded more than one poor girl who tried to comfort me while I was furious.
But that’s not all. I cry when I’m worn out and stressed too. Often pretty easily. This has sometimes very awkward. I have made many doctors (and 1 dentist) feel confused and perhaps even a little uncomfortable when they have just told me I am fine. And probably just have a viral infection or I need some antibiotics (with the dentist I had a cavity). At any rate I was given information that is completely minor in severity and I am reduced to tears.
I even cried in the front row of a 10 person University class with a disproportionately high workload when we were unable to persuade the professor that we needed an extension for our 30 page paper because it would throw off his schedule. Looking at this, you might think that I cry all the time. And although that is not actually true I do end up crying in front of my son and my handicapped brother more often than I would really like.
I actually think that it’s good for kids to see their parents have emotions and deal with them. I just wish my son didn’t have to have this valuable learning experience quite so often.
Because of my brother I’ve had to deal with this issue for a long time. It causes him distress to see anyone, but especially me, upset. So I am well practiced in the art of crying while assuring someone else that everything is still okay.
Usually what I say is “I’m feeling sad. It’s okay to feel sad sometimes. But I’m okay. I’m just feeling sad right now.” If I can explain why, then try to do that too, but that’s not always easy.
I’d love to know about some other strategies that I could use. What do you do when you cry in front of your kids?

Mother’s Day–Not Every Special Day is Going to be a Good Day

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I don’t actually mind the so called ‘Hallmark’ holidays. Having a day to remind you to stop and appreciate your sigDSC_0002nificant other, mother, father what have you, is overall I think a good thing. However, I do sympathize with those who dislike such holidays. It can put a lot of pressure on one day and it can be easy for many to feel left out.

For me, this mother’s day was… I can’t think of the right word, so perhaps I’ll just explain. When I woke up, I just wasn’t feeling well. I had a huge headache and was so emotionally fragile I wouldn’t be surprised if I made people wonder if I was pregnant. I recognized that I was grumpy, irritable and emotional, but sometimes having this level of introspection gets you no closer to being able to control these feelings.

That is not a good start. On top of that, my only child is 2. He doesn’t have a clue about what mother’s day is about. My husband, has many wonderful qualities but he is not likely to help my son do cute mother’s day crafts or anything or tell me just to put my feet up all day. Which really, I respect. I’m not his mother and he has his own mother he needs to try to make feel special that day.

So really it was just a day, and not a very good one. I didn’t even do a very good job of making my mother feel appreciated.

Now really, the day was fine. Gordie was an angel, my husband gave me a rose, and both our families had a lovely dinner together. And that is plenty to feel grateful for.

But in the end, it is just a day, and if it ends up being a bad or disappointing day it doesn’t matter. It’s just one day. Days like these are great opportunities to reflect on the important people who are or who have been in our lives but it’s best not to ascribe them too much meaning. All the other 364 days of the year are just as important. And overall? Those have been great.

It’s Okay to Complain

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Now that I’ve given myself permission, I’m going to get right at it. One of the things that drives me bonkers is the idea that you shouldn’t complain because somebody has it worse than you.

I saw this today on twitter. Calgary got snow – actually a fair bit of snow on April 28th.

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As you can see this is not an insignificant amount of snow. And is it now the end of April. Very few days this April have felt like spring so understandably people are complaining about it. But yesterday, the Southeast US was hit with massive numbers of tornados leading to a lot of devastation in the area.

Because of this, someone suggested that we shouldn’t complain about the snow because that is so much worse. I take exception to this concept.

Obviously, it is much worse to be in the Southeast US dealing with multiple tornados than in Calgary dealing with a few rogue snowflakes. I can’t imagine who would disagree with that. But that doesn’t mean it’s wrong to complain about snow in April.

Yes, sometimes it can put things in perspective to realize that you are actually quite fortunate but where does it end? Do we tell the people in Alabama that they shouldn’t complain because the earthquake in Japan was worse? It sounds ridiculous doesn’t it? But someone always has it worse than you.

I’ve seen this on a smaller scale too with mothers who have lost their babies or aren’t able to have babies telling women who are struggling with adjusting to motherhood or sleepless nights that they shouldn’t complain because at least they have babies. My heart goes out to these women. I truly wish that everyone who wanted to have a baby was able to. But their personal tragedies does not negate the difficulties of motherhood. Just because someone has it worse does not mean that your complaints are not legitimate.

Do people sometimes complain too much? Sure. Are some people a little overly dramatic about the minor inconveniences of life? Absolutely. But one person’s complaint in no way takes away from the reality of someone else’s difficulties. So as far as I’m concerned, complain away.

Guilt and Parenting

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One of the things that has surprised me the most since becoming a parent, is how much I would be plagued with guilt and doubt. For me this was especially true when Gordie was a small baby. Everything was so new and it seemed I was constantly having to make decisions that had no real right answer.

But the guilt and doubt I felt over these day to day decisions was nothing compared to how I felt when Gordie turned 1. That was when we found out that he wasn’t growing as expected. His weight was at the 3rd percentile. Now I realize that sometimes this is nothing. Some kids are just small. But the reason that they take weight and height measurements is because sometimes something is wrong.

When Gordie was born he was 9 lbs. That put him at the 85 percentile for weight. So being at the 3rd percentile after 12 months was definitely concerning.

It turned out that he was having a problem digesting dairy. He seems to react negatively to the protein in milk products resulting in a host of problems some of which I recognized as a problem and others that I didn’t until they went away.

It has now been a year and I still struggle with the guilt that I feel over this.

  • Why didn’t I realize what was happening sooner?
  • How could I have been feeding my baby what basically amounted to poison (for him)?
  • How could I not have noticed how small he was, how little he was eating, how cranky he was, how little he was doing?

It really shook my confidence as a mother. I was second guessing all the choices that I had made with regards to how I chose to feed him, sleep choices – everything.

Now I know this is not particularly rationale. I know I’m a good mom. I do. imageAnd I know that Gordie’s problems with milk were not my fault. In fact when I look back, I had realized that something was the matter and I was doing everything I could to figure out. I can’t even think of anything that I really should have done differently. And I know that it was in large part because of me that we figured it out as soon as we did.

Gordie is currently thriving and as of his 2 year check up is now back up to the 25th percentile.

And yet. The guilt is still there.

I do my best to forgive myself and to have realistic expectations for myself as a mother. Most of the time I think I succeed. But I still can’t quite shake the guilt I feel over this.

The Infectious Enthusiasm of a Toddler–Snow in April Sucks

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Last night it started to snow. In April. Not even early April, but April 13th. I was not impressed. I’m quite done with winter and snow in particular.

Gordie on the other hand looked out the window and said “It’s simagenowing!” with the enthusiasm of a child who had been hoping all Winter for just one day of snow.

This morning when I looked outside there was over a foot of wet, heavy snow. Seriously? I am almost desperate for Spring. I need sunlight again. And grass. Remember grass? I don’t ever want to leave the house again.

But Gordie takes one look and demands to “Go play in the snow!” He couldn’t have been more excited.

So I grabbed some things for a snowman and spent 20 minutes gimageetting us both into our snow gear. Gordie had the best time and honestly, it was the best part of my day too. Usually the snow in Calgary is too dry to stick together, so it’s nearly impossible to make snowmen and it’s usually unpleasantly cold at well. Today the snow was perfect and it was right around freezing.

It’s hard to stay in a bad mood when someone around you is having so much fun. That being said – snow in April still sucks.

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You Never Know When You’ll Be Confronted with a Scary Cow

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Although we have yet to find a monkey on our neighbourhood walks (despite frequently looking) we did have a run in with wildlife inside our own kitchen.

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I know, it is possibly the cutest looking cow ever made. And it’s only about the size of my palm. Gordie loved this cow. It was one of the first things that he tried to get me to buy at the store when he was around a year. It’s been up on a shelf though so he hasn’t seen it in a while. The cow eventually found it way back to civilization and I thought Gordie might like to see how it can moo if you push it’s tummy. It seemed like this would be fun because he would be old enough to do it now.

Well, that did not go over well. After a lot of tears and snuggles, I told the cow to stop making noises and we reached a peace. I know Gordie is a little sensitive to noises, but the quiet moo of this cute little cow? Whoops.